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25th-Sep-2007 03:03 pm
Right now as I am typing this sentence, someone who loves you and needs you is missing you terribly.

Fix that.

Figure out who it is, call or email them, and apologize for not spending enough time with them recently. Tell them you love them and make no excuses OR explanations for any absence or distance. Instead, tell them to come over and spend the night with you this weekend or ask to come over to their place and do the same. Bring chocolate, beer or wine, junk food of some sort, maybe even ice cream. Insist that the only appropriate attire is pajamas. Take them their favorite magazine, coffee, or rent their favorite movie.

If you have little money to spend on these things, that's okay. Wake up before they do the next morning and make them breakfast, then clean up their kitchen so they don't have to. Do it anyway because you love them, and make sure they know it. Reaffirm that you love them and need them, and that you would be a wreck without them.

Make this your new ritual.
25th-Sep-2007 08:57 pm (UTC)
I actually have a friend who had been missing for the past several days. Her roommates didn't know where she was, she hadn't shown to work in a week, her phone was off, and when I called her parents, they had no clue she had even disappeared. I kept texting her, even though she wasn't answering and I was really worried. I was on my way to the police department when she called me. She has been in the hospital for severe depression and attempted suicide for the last 8 days.

If I had done some of these suggestions, maybe she wouldn't have hurt herself.
25th-Sep-2007 09:04 pm (UTC)
A person's choices are their own, Lyssa. They're responsible for them and them alone. it is possible that you might have seen some signs and called some things into question, but there's nothing to do about that now - except to remember to stay in better contact with her in the future, and be as supportive as you know how to be.

I know you are feeling some very conflicting emotions right now, but the truth of it is this - if a person is on a crash course to destroy themselves, there is nothing you can do about that. She's obviously not one of those people, and is getting help for herself now. Be patient with her, and help her wherever you can by being the best friend you can be.

I send good energy for you both!
26th-Sep-2007 07:27 pm (UTC)
Though it is hard, don't beat yourself up about your friend hurting herself. You can't stop someone from being destructive, but you can now offer your love and support. I'm sure she will need it. I am glad that she got help for herself that is the first step.
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