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Not that either of these things are real revelations, but I'm taking a shot here... 
2nd-May-2007 10:08 pm
Bush: ‘I’m the Commander Guy’
President Bush coined a new nickname for himself — ‘’the commander guy” — on Wednesday, as he criticized Congressional Democrats in a speech to the annual gathering of the Associated General Contractors of America, a construction industry trade group.

The man who last year proclaimed “I’m the decider,’’ in response to a question about whether he would fire Donald Rumsfeld as defense secretary, came up with this latest moniker in explaining why he vetoed an Iraq war spending bill that dictated a timeline for troops to withdraw from Iraq.

“The question is, ‘Who ought to make that decision, the Congress or the commanders?,’’ Mr. Bush said. “As you know, my position is clear – I’m the commander guy.”
Vatican calls verbal attack on Pope "terrorism"
ROME (Reuters) - The Vatican's official newspaper accused an Italian comedian on Wednesday of "terrorism" for criticizing the Pope and warned his rhetoric could fuel a return to 1970s-style political violence.

In an unusually strongly worded editorial, L'Osservatore Romano said a presenter of a televised May Day rock concert, which is sponsored by Italy's labor unions, had launched "vile attacks" on Pope Benedict in front of an "excitable crowd".

"This, too, is terrorism. It's terrorism to launch attacks on the Church," it said. "It's terrorism to stoke blind and irrational rage against someone who always speaks in the name of love, love for life and love for man."

So basically, Der Chimpenfuhrer again proves he is less adept than a fuckin' 12 year old boy, and the Catholic Church has the goddamned nerve to posit that being held to scutiny is tantamount to a terrorist action.



"Commander guy". Sounds catchy. Like something you'd want to call your team leader in a nifty game of night time lazer tag - but certainly not what one wants to hear from the President of the United States. Hands up - who else is again made to feel completely embarrassed to be an American by this stupid motherfucker? I swear, every time he opens his smirking suck hole it's like watching really bad karaoke. I'm no fan of American Idol, but I'd rather suffer Sangina singing all 6 hours of American Pie while being fisted by Randy Jackson than to have GWB make me suffer one more Bushism.

As for the Vatican thing, what a bunch of juiceless, raggedy-assed, spineless, insipid, kid fucking motherfuckers! You cunting bastards have the fucking nerve to tell me I'm evil for being a faggot, but when someone - a goddamned comedian, for shit's sake - takes a jab at you, you cry terrorism and scream "RED BRIGADES!! QUICK, HIDE THE ALTAR WINE AND EUCHARIST WAFERS!!" And of course by alter wine I mean Jesus juice and by eucharist wafers I mean Snicker's bars laced with roofies.

If criticizing the Catholic Church is the same thing as terrorism, then from now on just call me Osama bin Fagulous, leader of the Al Gayda network. We're coming for you, Benny, you Emperor Palpatine looking whore - and we're bringing poppers, Crisco, and an arsenal of dildoes from Fort Troff - piss me off, and I'll bring Christopher Lowell too. You are SO fucked, bitches.
3rd-May-2007 02:50 am (UTC)
I came over by way of polardemonwolf's blog - the write-up about Dubya being "The Commander" ... I'm really ashamed of being an American, too.

The whole entry is funny as hell - and how does someone join the Al Gayda network, anyways? :-)
3rd-May-2007 03:17 am (UTC)
I'll make you an honorary member if you say something true about the Catholic church, something they are not partial to hearing - it being true and all.
3rd-May-2007 03:31 am (UTC)
Well damn ... I'm not Catholic, although I did date a former Catholic schoolgirl. So, all I can say is that, yes, a lof of Catholic Schoolgirls are as promiscuous as rumored.

But, if you want something about the Mormons (the faith I grew up in ... and survived somehow!) I'd be more than happy to provide that. :)
3rd-May-2007 03:35 am (UTC)
Fair enough - I pronounce thee Al Gayda worthy.

Mormons are still too green to be taken seriously, and besides - I think a lot of them realize how ridiculous they are and cease drinking the proverbial Kool-Aid, not unlike yourself apparently!
3rd-May-2007 03:46 am (UTC)

Yeah - I stopped drinking that Kool-Aid when I was a teenager. I ended up spending my time in the church after that just pretending to go along with it all.

Also, being queer in the Mormon church isn't exactly acceptable ... so I just cut my losses and left!
3rd-May-2007 08:39 pm (UTC)
Catholics are pussies about service length; come to an Orthodox Easter service, motherfucker, and stand for four hours, it's good for you!

Also, they're post-schismatic breakaway upstarts, so their priesthood is invalid.
3rd-May-2007 02:55 am (UTC)
He calls me immoral and he's fulfilling god's will. I call his logic wrong and I'm a bigot. And now a terrorist.

I seethe with rage.
3rd-May-2007 03:18 am (UTC)
A sexier seether I have yet to encounter.
3rd-May-2007 03:35 am (UTC)
You've been on my to-do list for some time now.
3rd-May-2007 03:38 am (UTC)
I'd dip you in BBQ sauce, work you like a rib, and you'd hate every other man you touch.
3rd-May-2007 03:39 am (UTC)
You're my kinda guy. I just wanna rub my beard under your balls until it scratches to walk the next day...and you like it.
3rd-May-2007 03:42 am (UTC)
That's what neosporin & modal boxer briefs are for. ;-)
3rd-May-2007 03:19 am (UTC)
and by wrong, certainly you mean nonexistent, correct?
3rd-May-2007 03:34 am (UTC)
That's probably the better statement.
3rd-May-2007 03:35 am (UTC)
I concur fully.
3rd-May-2007 03:37 am (UTC)
You know the Bible 2%!

Linda Blair learned more about Jesus than you have just by jamming that crucifix up her twat!

Ultimate Bible Quiz
Create MySpace Quizzes

3rd-May-2007 03:39 am (UTC)
I scored like 90+ on that meme thingy, which is rather funny when you think about it.
3rd-May-2007 03:42 am (UTC)
I'd probably have done very well, but I just hacked the code.
3rd-May-2007 03:01 am (UTC)
Ah, blow it out your ass you primping, silk swathed, gold encumbered, prada wearing shit for brains.

No, better yet shove THIS up your puckered popechute and keep it all in there where it belongs.

3rd-May-2007 03:19 am (UTC)
3rd-May-2007 03:38 am (UTC)
That just got you commando-friended.

That's right. I friended you without asking AND without underwear.
3rd-May-2007 03:43 am (UTC)
Oh man - I want to be in on this 3-way, however I can.
3rd-May-2007 03:46 am (UTC)
Great. I need a butt massage.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

You're next!
3rd-May-2007 03:55 am (UTC)
I'll do you one better - How about a video? Email me for the link: jude@thedigitalghost.com. Also, do you know about my naughty blog? It's called ghostofaman. I think you'd like it. ;-)
3rd-May-2007 04:03 am (UTC)
I did. I friended ghostofaman but just had on my profile that I was over 21. I wanna see your perversion!

Thanks, I'll email you.
3rd-May-2007 04:28 am (UTC)
That Catholic church thing is the biggest load of steaming crap I've heard in quite some time. Terrorism, my ass. They should be ashamed of throwing that word around so lightly. Once someone starts blowing shit up under your dresses, and you cannot ride the Pope mobile for fear of land mines, then start bawling, you fuckers.

Jude, hand me a greased dildo; I'm going in! Wait a minute... that's like tossing chocolate-covered Twinkies at the Biggest Loser contestants! It's not going to make the Catholic priests quake in fear! They'll be dropping trou faster than CLinton in his hey-day.
3rd-May-2007 04:55 am (UTC)
I'd love to join the Al Gayda netowrk, too. :) I love reading your LJ.
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