Brad Smith (jesus_h_biscuit) wrote,
Brad Smith
jesus_h_biscuit

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"She's Gone..." - Jenn, Uncle Johnny's wife to us in the waiting room

I left work and went to the hospital this morning at 10AM. As I rounded the corner to the waiting room for the ICU, Uncle John was walking down the hall toward me. I held out my arms and held him for a minute or two, and he finally broke a bit. (I know it is in his nature to hold it in.)

Somewhere close to 11, the doctor came to take her off of the life support system. The family had to wait outside while they did this. Paw Paw, Maggie, Nathan, & myself did not want to go in. They came and told us a few minutes later that she was breathing on her own. Paw Paw jumped up and ran to her.

30 seconds after he walked in, she flatlined and her heart stopped. Her breathing ceased. Paw Paw started wailing and crying and then the most remarkable thing happened.

Her heart started beating again.

He held her hands and told her "It's okay, Mama - you can go now." Then that was it, she was gone.

She waited for him. She waited for him to get there before she would go. Granny was a lady. A lady always knows when to leave.

When Jenn came in to tell us that it was over, I kissed Maggie and told her I had to go. I called Damien and asked him to meet me at the house. I went home and ate lunch while I still had an appetite, and then laid down with him and told him everything. I showed him a side of myself most people don't get to see. He's just the sweetest thing ever, he just let me talk and stayed right at my side. It was just what I needed.

Right now, I'm fine. In a very real way, I'm relieved. Conversely, I'm crushed and I miss my Granny.

I want to thank each of you for your support and for your kind words as of late, they have done more for me than you know. Cheryl, Ryno, Patrick, Melissa, Jennie, Andrew, Renea, and especially Damien - thank you for your energy and love. It will be returned to all you the first opportunity I get.
Tags: grief
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