Brad Smith (jesus_h_biscuit) wrote,
Brad Smith
jesus_h_biscuit

Recent "Cole-oquiallisms"

"My God this is annoying."
- in response to the musical intro to nick.com




"Hey Mistuh DJ, put on a wecowd, I wanna dance wif my baby...UH! UH! UH!" ::pelvic thrust::



"Is my chili as good as Mommy's?"
- Me

"No, it's bettuh. (looking over at Maggie, then back to me) ..I mean, no, it's not as good. I mean, yes - wait a minute, I can't weemembuh."
- Cole




"Can you explain why you've had such a bad day at school today?"
- Me

"I would, but I can't weemembuh."
- Cole

"Oh please, man! You remember that I was mean two years ago because I put the cat outside, but you don't remember something you did two hours ago?"
- Me

"Well, yes."
- Cole

"Cole, you need to do better than that. What happened today?"
- Me

(emphatically, as though this were just base logic) "You know what? I fink dat because it's so hot outside,, da heat has fwied my bwain, and so I cannot tell you because I actuawwy CAN'T weemembuh."
- Cole




"Kiss me, boyfriend."
- Illeigh

"HELL no - I'm wunnin' away fwom you!"
- Cole




"Illeigh said she saw a snake by the swings at the pike. But then again, she lies moye than anyone I know."



"Is it time foye the bitches to come in and eat?"
- regarding the family dogs




"Cole, you cleaned up your room, right?"
- Maggie

"Nope, you aye wong."
- Cole




"Mommy, Nafen said 'Mudduhfuckuw' again."
- Cole

::blank stare:: "He did? Okay then, let's hope he doesn't say that again."
- Maggie

"But he did say 'Mudduhfuckuw', Mommy."
- Cole

"Okay, honey - I believe you."
- Maggie

"He weally did say it, he said 'Mudduhfuckuw'. I pwomise."
- Cole

::stern look:: "Cole, that's enough."
- Maggie

(from the living room) "MUTHA FUCKAH!!"
- Nathan

::supressing a giggle:: "MOMMY!!"
- Cole




"Who Fahyted?"
- Cole

"I pooted"
- Nathan

::accusatory tone, defiant & emphatic:: "Bullsit - that was no 'poot', Nayfen - YOU FAHYTED. Now go wipe."
- Cole
Tags: cole-oquialisms, kids
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