Brad Smith (jesus_h_biscuit) wrote,
Brad Smith

Out-Of-The-Blue update

I cannot stress how much this Mythmas meant to me on an emotional level, or how surprised I was to receive more presents this year than I have in the past 20 - no exaggeration. I spent a great deal of time with the family, which is always great. Yesterday D and I went to my father's house for my blood-family Mythmas celebration day, which was very nice. I couldn't recall ever seeing my father quite as talkative and animated as he was yesterday. He spent a lot of time talking to D as well which made me immensely happy.

We had some down time in the afternoon, having been the first ones to arrive, so I took him on a tour of all the places I lived when we first moved down here and got to see the old neighborhoods I'd terrorized as a kid. It was all so different seeing it as a grown up, especially with all of the new development that has happened.

I've collected a bunch of news links for a future News post, but am kind of avoiding my usual news services because frankly I'm overstimulated by all of the tsunami information and images. I can handle a lot of stuff on most days, but I cannot handle the seemingly endless stream of Flash-driven scenes of death, destruction, and grief. Enough is too much. Whenever I see someone in a car wreck on the road, my first instinct is to jump out and help wherever I can. I've done it many times before, only I cannot ever run fast enough to get to the scene to start helping out. I see tragedies like this one and all I want to do is be there to help out, with cleanup or rebuilding or giving medical assistance or grief counseling - whatever. But I can't do that, and the guilt I feel for my good life in the wake of other's suffering is crushing. We take SO much for granted that it is unbelievable. This is all I'm going to say about this for the time being, I cannot give it too much of myself.

I've been absorbing one of my Mythmas gifts, the Legacy Edition of Jeff Buckley Live At Sin-é, which is absolutely mesmerizing. I cannot wait to get the Grace Legacy Edition. Speaking of, there is now a video for my favorite Grace outtake, the immaculate Forget Her. It is part of the DVD package that comes with the 3 disc Grace Legacy Edition.
"Don't fool yourself,
She was heartache from the moment that you met her."

I'm counting on a quiet New Year's Eve with the family this year. I'm planning a year-end post that represents some of the things I experienced and/or internalized this year, I'm sure it will be quite lengthy. For now, that is all.
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