Already I have threatned to club her like a baby seal, pinch her little nose off, and beat her with her own severed arm. She stared blankly at me, told me "Ewe siddy" (translation - "You're silly") and ran in the opposite direction caterwauling like a banshee on fire. The dog started barking incessantly and I threatned to carve her eyeballs out with a spoon - which amused the Ballistic Princess no end.
I'm both sleepy AND tired, which makes for one very grumpy bastard. Please, hold all calls and such today unless there are blood and bruises involved. Or a winning Lotto ticket.