October 3rd, 2008




Who's the bane of YOUR existence? Surely there's someone who pisses you off in such a huge way that it merits flogging, at least. 'Round here, we call that person a RAT BASTARD. Who is the person you most want to rip a new asshole for whatever reason? Go ahead - now's your chance to put them on blast. Start commenting, and have fun gettin' your hate on - and out. IP logging is off and anonymous commenters WERE welcome, but I've had to disable it since I've gotten six tons of bullshit spam comments lately. Sorry about that.

Go on - vent your spleen...

Also, check out/participate in the Friday Confessional and the subsequent Sunday Stoning, brought to you by the fantastic city_of_dis.

I'm Trying REALLY Hard Not To Freak Out

Two boys from my nephew's high school were arrested yesterday for bringing loaded guns to school, guns they stole from a house they broke into last Friday. One of the boys has a history of bullying and harassing Jake for well over a year now and has made numerous threats against him as well as physically assaulting him on more than one occasion. Jake is the kid who wears the goth clothes and has a mohawk, he doesn't take shit off these kids who pick on him and understands that the price of being different means you're going to get gawked at by ignorant assholes. He wore a Bad Religion t-shirt and was sent to the office because it offended some other students who it was later found were staging it because they don't like the fact that Jake is an atheist. The principal told them that it was his right and that they needed to get over themselves.

The story is only being covered by one local news station as far as I can tell, having just broke this morning. Only last night Jake was telling us upon hearing the rumor about this incident that he was actually becoming fearful of them for the first time at the possibility of this being true and wanted us to call his counselor tomorrow. Only last week someone tried to pick him up and throw him into a trashcan, but he didn't know who it was as there were many kids trying to board the bus home. He had an altercation with this kid as recently as a week ago at the bus stop, wherein the kid verbally assaulted Jake.

They stashed the guns in the bathroom ceiling tiles so as to avoid the hall monitor cameras. They were showing them off to others on the bus yesterday when a student text messaged soemone on another bus to let them know what was going on out of fear, the student receiving the text notified their bus driver and that was when the authorities got involved and boarded the bus for search and seizure of alleged weapons. The kids at that point were passing the guns back and forth under their seats to try and thwart them, and a female student smuggled the guns off the bus in a backpack - but obviously to no avail.

I know that he's safer today than he was yesterday and that the boys in question are now in custody, but I'm having a rough time calming myself down because I'm motherfucking furious. Not just at these kids, but at their parents as well for not doing a better job in knowing who their children really are.

I've collected myself and spoken on the phone with close friends before posting this, and I'm beyond furious right now. Believe me, six different kinds of hell will be raised in the days to come.

EDIT 1: They changed the news story, apparently the kids are in the custody of their parents. WHAT. THE. FUCK.

EDIT 2: I just received an email from the news channel covering this story after I left a comment on the site asking if we would like to be interviewed. I called the reported back as he'd asked me to do and we spoke for several minutes. He asked if I would be willing to go on camera, and I told him I would consult with my family and get back to him. Of course I would be willing if we agree as a family, but I'm not willing to make that decision without first discussing it with them.

About Jake & My Whole Reaction To This Situation

For a long time I thought that Jake would be the closest thing I would ever have to having a son of my own. This was before I decided I wouldn't have my own children and before the other kids (Cole, Sara Claire, Avery, Willow) were born. When Christi (daisy_down, Jake's mother) suspected at the age of 17 that she might be pregnant, it was me she told first. When she and Tarah (another dear friend I made around the same time who introduced me to Christi) confirmed this by a pregnancy test, it was in my house. She began crying and said "What am I going to do?", to which I replied "No, honey - what are WE going to do" - thus solidifying our relationship. This relationship has endured ever since.

Just this week she mentioned to me that if she looked into his future as a grown man that I would be on his top 5 list of most influential people. We're very close. I've written about him a few times before. She also mentioned that if I were to die tomorrow I could rest assured that I would be leaving this world in a better condition than I came into it in, if for nothing else than my relationship with Jacob.

When Jake was a baby, they moved to Florida for a short while and I kept a pair of Jake's footy pajamas and tied the arms in a knot around a belt loop of my favorite pair of jeans so it would be like he was hugging me every time I wore them. I kept them until they moved back. I told Jake this story only last night, as a matter of fact.

Try as I may, I cannot stop thinking about his life over the years and all of the growing up moments he's had, from his imaginary legion of 'police animals' that played Cops with him in our backyard to his obsession with the number 27. "Jake, what time is it?" 27. "Jake, how many fingers am I holding up?" 27. His first day of kindergarten, and driving him to school each moring thereafter. His plans to build robots and be a 'dirt worker' who drove backhoes and bulldozers.

And today all of that has felt threatened. Today I had to consider the reality of what can happen in an instant if left unchecked - and your life will never be the same again, not ever, and not for the better. For the first time ever I had to imagine today what it might be like to lose him, to see him walk out the door for another school day just like any other and never come back.

The last thing I told him last night before he went to bed was "Goodnight baby, I love you and I'll see you tomorrow." I'm unimaginably grateful that I'll be able now to say that many times more because of the bravery of the girl who sent the text message about the guns on the bus.

I've cried off and on all morning and afternoon, and to her credit, the baby (Willow, whom I've taken care of for the past two weeks) has noticed when I'm upset and comes over to shove Froot Loops into my mouth with a big, toothy grin and a laugh.

I don't wish these feelings on anyone, and we didn't even have to endure the kind of tragedy that the families of those who went through Columbine and similar school shootings did. If you have children, please tell them about this close call that has happened to my family. Hug them tightly, kiss them a thousand times while you tell them how loved and special they are and above all make it a point to know what is going on in their lives.