Brad Smith (jesus_h_biscuit) wrote,
Brad Smith

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My fever at present is 102. My body feels like my clothes are ripping my skin off, and I'm wearing the softest fleece I own. I have a ripping headache. I keep alternating between shivering and shaking because it's either too hot or too cold. My whole body feels like it's on fire. Coughing hurts like you wouldn't believe. I'm taking the maximum strength Robitussin cough stuff (Thank you again, Kevin - MAJOR cool points for even offering) but I cannot tell if it makes a difference or not. Of all times for me to get the flu too, when Drew is in California and I'm covering his shifts for him. Oh well, sometimes things pan out like this.

Drew did call earlier to let me know that he was in LA, and that his flight was okay except for the 5 year old that kicked his seat for the duration of the flight. I told him to have a good time and not think about Columbus or anyone in it for the next few days.

I tried to call Kevin once I got to work this morning, but his voicemail got the call. I'm guessing he was also feeling terrible and just went to bed. If he feels ANYTHING like I do, I hope he is asleep and that he takes the day off tomorrow to rest and recover. I'd give anything to be able to watch him sleep right now, and I have NO idea why I would think such a thing.

I really like this guy. He's very much grounded into the same reality that I am, and the more I talk to him the more comfortable I feel instead of the familiar defenses and walls.

Dare I say it? Am I actually giving someone the benefit of the doubt that he might ACTUALLY turn out to be a decent man that is good for me?

I know you're reading this and blushing - you're SO cute when you do that too. I hear it in the phone and I can tell when I've said something that makes you blush. It is in those moments that I wish you were sitting next to me so I could steal a kiss.

For the time being, we both have to work on getting over being ill - and PLEASE know that if I gave this to you, that I am very sorry. What a gift on a first date, huh? I give you the flu, you give me a candle. Which, incidentally, is burning as I type.

I want so many things right now. I'm keeping most of that to myself.

It is noteworthy that if I imagine you sitting across from me and grinning that I can see your sweet face and it makes me feel a lot better. Sleep well - I will call you when I wake up in the afternoon, around 1 or so. Email me or post a comment to this entry, I'm sending you good energy and light.

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