Brad Smith (jesus_h_biscuit) wrote,
Brad Smith

Bitter & Sad

An extraordinary loss for the world happened today when a 18 year old young woman was murdered by the 18 year old boyfriend in a deeply troubled and darkly tumultuous relationship that friends had warned her about. This one affects me personally because Monique Cota was my friend, and just like that, I'll never see her smiling, adorable face with the long hair spun from finest delicate silk, the caramel color of her skin magnifying the deep emerald brilliance of her eyes; almond shaped and always soothing when they met yours - ever again.

She was the kind of girl that you stopped to admire, because her radiating beauty, energy, and sense of calm was amazing. All that power at 18 and she never even knew it let alone wore it on her sleeve - and such a thing on her would seem vulgar - and she was anything but. She was the kind of girl that ran on her own frequency.

I also think she was the kind of girl that was so lovestruck that she wanted to save the broken boy and try to put him together so that he might resemble something of a good man, and see in him potential no one else could see and ran contrary to the pleas and criticism of others. Once she realized he wasn't savable she managed to gather herself up and was planning a move to Cali where she had a new job lined up and a promising future with a childhood sweetheart she had recently become engaged to. That was until Eric Coulter lured her to his parents' home and shot her in the face with his AR-15.

She never had a negative or mean thing to say about anyone and she didn't pick sides. She was all at once together and composed and sure of herself, and I never saw a scratch on her. That's why it pains me to think that inside she might have been in pieces.

A gorgeous, gentle, and kind 18 year old child is dead tonight in Arizona, and two entire families are destroyed while a third family of co-workers are also trying with all their might to make sense of it all and find some peace within this rude shock. That's the family of Fry's Marketplace, or as I like to call it, "628", and I know them well. I should by now, visiting the store sometimes just to say hello and usually about 2-3 times per week - so I'm more of an adopted member of the family, but that's the thing about this that's so special - no one there ever treats me like I'm not in that family. That's how I know how big their bond is and what it's made of.

So to my Fry's family, and all of the friends I've made there, my heart goes out to each and every one of you. This entire thing is just a sad, tragic waste and I'm truly heartbroken. I'll always see Monique just as I did a few days ago, when I waved to her at the CS desk on my way out of the store, and she waved back to me and smiled that smile where her eyes narrowed and she showed teeth, still the beautiful and sweet girl I've always known since she started working there. I cannot take any of this away, as much as I want to, but I can help you carry it. So if you need or want that, I will help you carry it. It's the best I've got.

To Monique's other family, friends, and loved ones; I don't have tears enough for what you're going through let alone what is coming, and I wish you as much peace as you can get - because you deserve it.

Fly away now, precious girl.
Tags: grief, monique cota

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