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BACK DOOR BOY IN A FRONT DOOR WORLD
OUTSIDE OF SOCIETY - THAT'S WHERE I WANT TO BE
Hopes For The New Year 
1st-Jan-2005 01:19 pm
Good things will happen this year. Last year was fraught with some stuff that was less than stellar, some more than others. I learned a lot and grew more than I thought I could. I've begun to feel older, to really feel my age, and I'm closer to being happy than I ever knew was possible. I never thought I would live past 30, so it's a really profound and excellent discovery.

New layout coming soon, I feel the need to make things light and clean. I'm going to get more things accomplished this year just for myself, I'm going to take more time for myself, I'm going to make my body look like I want it to look.

I told Damien on Thursday evening that there was no one I put before him, and that no one I loved more. I told him that I was giving up on tradition and what is expected, giving up on that for what rules we decide for ourselves and throwing the door wide open. This just feels like our time now. I love when the world gets a glimpse of what I see in him, I love being reminded how lucky I am to have him, and I am. I am very honored and humbled by his love, it's extraordinary.

The icon I'm using was made from pictures taken one year ago today, it felt appropriate.

I will be a better man this year than at any time before in my life, and it will all be a product of me getting rid of baggage. Some stuff we hold on to out of nothing but habit, the emotion ran dry a long time ago and that was the motivation to hold on in the first place. For those things, it is time for a ceremonious burial. Once grief becomes second nature, like breathing, it is time for it to be dismissed for something else. It is just time.

I will be writing a lot more this year.
I will be composing and creating all sorts of things.
I will challenge myself and continue raising that bar whenever I can.
I will share myself more and make more time to let people who are precious know that they are.
I will spend more time with friends here and in Atlanta, and I will take countless photographs to document everything - significant and insignificant.
I will encourage others to let go of fear and all of the negative energy it produces.
I will create happy surprises for others, and leave small amounts of money around for others in public places.
I will take more time to show the children that they are the most beautiful, intelligent, and precious things ever by worshipping them and celebrating them every day.
I will not associate or give my time to energy vampires, those people who end up sucking your energy dry - intentionally or not.
I will celebrate beginnings and endings, and find the value in both.
I will set an example by saying no to fear, and will not allow myself to feel afraid, and will encourage others to do so as well.
I will not be stressed by anything I have no power to control or input to change.

Happy Birthday to my baby boy Cole, who turned 8 years old today. He may not look it much these days, but he will always be my baby boy.

If I'm lucky, I've inspired someone who reads this and challenged them to seek their own truth and share it with others.
Comments 
1st-Jan-2005 06:24 pm (UTC)
love you guys.
1st-Jan-2005 06:27 pm (UTC)
Love you too, honey. We're getting together a lot more now, there's a lot to explore and I would love for us all to make new discoveries together.
1st-Jan-2005 06:29 pm (UTC)
here's to 2005.
1st-Jan-2005 06:30 pm (UTC)
Yes, to 2005! I just edited this post, you might want to reread it.
1st-Jan-2005 06:32 pm (UTC)
*smiles*

<3
1st-Jan-2005 06:38 pm (UTC)
word.. we all need to chill sometime.. seriously.. last year slacked off too much.. i saw you, what.. once? twice? too little.. so yeah.. here's to 2005 :)
1st-Jan-2005 06:52 pm (UTC)
It is so good to be hearing from you again, J - I mean it. I cannot wait to see you again!
1st-Jan-2005 07:16 pm (UTC)
actually, instead of J, use E.. methinks i wanna start going by my middle name.. because it's super-hip :)
1st-Jan-2005 07:17 pm (UTC)
Agreed, but can I refer to you as Sir E?
1st-Jan-2005 07:37 pm (UTC)
whatever works for you..
1st-Jan-2005 08:58 pm (UTC)
Happy New Year dear man. You bring such joy to my spirit.
2nd-Jan-2005 12:27 am (UTC)
YAY!! Happy New Year to you too, sweetness!
5th-Jan-2005 09:53 pm (UTC)
It seems to me that you already do and are so much of what you want to be! Keep on bringing joy and peace to our spritits and bringing light to the ignorant. Your rock de mos! I know it's gonna be a good year!
6th-Jan-2005 12:27 am (UTC)
You are the sweetest. I heart you.
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