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BACK DOOR BOY IN A FRONT DOOR WORLD
OUTSIDE OF SOCIETY - THAT'S WHERE I WANT TO BE
Weekend in Review 
12th-Dec-2004 09:54 pm
This weekend was kind of "The Suck". Very emotional for almost everyone on some level or another, and also very long and tedious. I'm not going into details, because frankly a lot of this I need to work on forgetting.

I made up my mind early this morning that I need to cook a lot this week. Cooking gives me balance and a sense of peace and order in an otherwise chaotic world. Plus, it's right in keeping with my nurturing side to feed people satisfying and really good home cooked meals. It is getting a bit cooler here finally, and when the weather starts getting cooler I begin to crave spicy food and lots of soups and stews. Nothing fits that ideal better than Cajun, and for variety I'm also doing Cuban. I made up my shopping list, and so I could have a little time away from the house and my worries this afternoon I did the only thing I enjoy more than actually cooking - grocery shopping.

Being that I'm thrifty and have learned how to keep a pretty well stocked pantry, I only spent $60 and came home with enough food to make the four meals I'm cooking this week, which will also be enough to generate leftovers for lunch. Here's what I'm making:

Monday
Chicken & Andouille Sausage Gumbo

Tuesday
- not a DAMNED thing, it's my Birthday and I'm eating sushi until I go fucking blind

Wednesday
Chipotle Barbecued Pork
- tortillas
- mixed green salad

Thursday
Red Beans & Rice
- Caesar Salad

Friday
Black Bean Soup
- Mushroom and roasted green chile quesadillas


All of these recipes will eventually go on my cookbook website, I promise. I'm going to take lots of pictures of everything being prepared to go into the recipe pages as well, in keeping with the rest of the site.

I have to say something else here as well, because it is important that I not only share this with him but in such a way that everyone can know it as well. Damien, I love you more and more all of the time - I want you to know that. I cannot explain to you how much better you have made me feel today. You know how difficult it is for me to cry in front of people, even (and especially) when it comes from frustration, and even when the person is you. Simply reaching over to hold my hand when I broke down and lost it and not saying a single word was just what I needed. What you did was exactly what the timing in that situation needed, and I love and respect you so much because of that. It would only be someone who knows me as well as you do to know how to react to me in a situation when I feel most vulnerable, and you made me feel grounded and hopeful that this will all get better in that simple, yet powerful gesture.

My hope for anyone reading this is for you all to have for yourselves someone who makes you feel as lucky, as honored, and as completely loved as I do. I arrive at this realization where he is concerned every couple of months, but this time it is the best gift I could be given right now. I am most grateful.
Comments 
13th-Dec-2004 05:06 am (UTC)
Thank you for allowing me to read your beautiful words of love. You and Damien are amazing.
13th-Dec-2004 05:27 am (UTC)
You're welcome, sweetie - and thank you for the kind words! The truth is he is arguably the best thing that has ever happened to me. It's funny, but even when things are tense between us I still learn more from him than I ever could or would on my own.
13th-Dec-2004 05:14 pm (UTC)
I'm so happy for you and Damien. I always said you would find that special person one day. Thanks for sharing. You deserve it. I can't tell you how much I wish I could be there to sample your cooking! And I know this is the wrong comment but while I'm here, I love your Lichtenstein-esqe artwork! So much fun!
13th-Dec-2004 05:19 pm (UTC)
Yes you did, and right you were!

I'm going to cook for you one of these days, only you have to pick what we eat.

I'm glad you like the artwork, it's a lot of fun to make!
13th-Dec-2004 05:37 pm (UTC)
And what time is dinner tonight, ah hell...every night this week???
13th-Dec-2004 05:40 pm (UTC)
I'm thinking 6:30 or 7, maybe.
13th-Dec-2004 05:42 pm (UTC)
Wish it wasn't so far!
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