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BACK DOOR BOY IN A FRONT DOOR WORLD
OUTSIDE OF SOCIETY - THAT'S WHERE I WANT TO BE
Why I Love The Indigo Girls 
23rd-Nov-2003 09:19 am
"Now I'm tryin to get back
to what I know that I should be
hoping to God that I was just
a temporary absentee."

- Gerard McHugh

I love and adore the Indigo Girls. They are far beyond amazing. There is something about this music, something that reaches deep places you never knew you had. It is much, much more than the sum of its parts. This music makes me truly feel like I'm home and reaffirms my belief that as long as one person understands me, then it doesn't matter if no one else does. When I met Emily Saliers this past summer, I was so ecstatic to be standing in front of her that I neglected to tell her how grateful I am that she does what she does, because her music has saved me from myself many times. I've posted behind LJ-cut the lyrics to my favorite songs by the Indigo Girls, the ones that represent something precious to me. If you don't know these songs by heart, then shame on you.


Blood & Fire
i have spent nights with matches and knives
leaning over ledges only two flights up
cutting my heart, burning my soul
nothing left to hold
nothing left but blood and fire

you have spent nights thinking of me
missing my arms but you needed to leave
leaving my cuts, leaving my burns
hoping i'd learn

but blood and fire
are too much for these restless arms to hold
and my nights of desire they're calling me
back to your fold
and i am calling you, calling you
from 10,000 miles away
won't you whet my fire with your love
babe

i am looking for someone who can take as much as i give
and give back as much as i need
you know and they still have the will to live ah no
cause i am intense, i am in need
i am in pain, i am in love
and i feel forsaken you know
like the things i gave away

and blood and fire
are too much for these restless arms to hold
and my nights of desire they're calling me
back to your fold
and i am calling you, calling you
from 10,000 miles away
won't you whet my fire with your love
babe, babe, babe

i am intense, i am in need, i am in pain, i am in love
you know i am intense, i am in need, i am in pain, i am in love
i am intense, i am in need, i am in pain, i am in love
and blood and fire
are too much for these restless arms to hold
and my nights of desire they're calling me
back to your fold
and i am calling you, calling you
from 10,000 miles away
won't you whet my fire with your love
babe
won't you whet my fire with your love
babe now
whet my fire with your love


Fugitive
i'm harboring a fugitive
defector of a kind
and she lives in my soul
drinks of my wine
and i'd give my last breath
to keep us alive

are they coming for us
with cameras or guns
we don't know which
but we gotta run
and you say this is not
what i bargained for

so hide yourself for me
all for me

we swore to ourselves
we'd go to the end of the world
but i got caught up in the whirl
and the twirl of it all
a day in the sun
dancing alone
baby i'm so sorry

now it's coming to you
the lessons i've learned
won't do you any good
you've got to get burned
well the curse and the blessing
they're one in the same
baby it's all
such a treacherous gain

hide yourself for me
i said hide yourself for me
all for me

i stood without clothes
danced in the sand
i was aching with freedom
and kissing the damned
i said remember this
as how it should be

oh baby i said
it's all in our hands
got to learn to respect
what we don't understand
we are fortunate ones
fortunate ones
i swear

hide yourself for me
i will hide myself for you
all for you
(i will hide)
all for you
(myself for you)
i will hide myself for you
all for you

i stood without clothes
i danced in the sand
i was aching with freedom
kissing the damned
i said remember this
is how it should be


Ghost
there's a letter on the desktop
that i dug out of a drawer
the last truce we ever came to
in our adolescent war
and i start to feel the fever
from the warm air through the screen
you come regular like seasons
shadowing my dreams

and the mississippi's mighty
but it starts in minnesota
at a place that you could walk across
with five steps down
and i guess that's how you started
like a pinprick to my heart
but at this point you rush right through me
and i start to drown

and there's not enough room
in this world for my pain
signals cross and love gets lost
and time passed makes it plain
of all my demon spirits
i need you the most
i'm in love with your ghost
i'm in love with your ghost

dark and dangerous like a secret
that gets whispered in a hush
(don't tell a soul)
when i wake the things i dreamt about you
last night make me blush
(don't tell a soul)
and you kiss me like a lover
then you sting me like a viper
i go follow to the river
play your memory like a piper

and i feel it like a sickness
how this love is killing me
i'd walk into the fingers
of your fire willingly
and dance the edge of sanity
i've never been this close
i'm in love with your ghost

unknowing captor
you never know how much you
pierce my spirit
but i can't touch you
can you hear it
a cry to be free
oh i'm forever under lock and key
as you pass through me

now i see your face before me
i would launch a thousand ships
to bring your heart back to my island
as the sand beneath me slips
as i burn up in your presence
and i know now how it feels
to be weakened like achilles
with you always at my heels

this bitter pill i swallow
is the silence that i keep
it poisons me i can't swim free
the river is too deep
though i'm baptized by your touch
i am no worse than most
in love with your ghost

you are shadowing my dreams



Hammer & A Nail
clearing webs from the hovel
a blistered hand on the handle of a shovel
i've been digging too deep
i always do
i see my face on the surface
i look a lot like narcissus
a dark abyss of an emptiness
standing on the edge of a drowning blue

i look behind my ears for the green
and even my sweat smells clean
glare off the white hurts my eyes
i gotta get out of bed
get a hammer and a nail
learn how to use my hands
not just my head
i think myself in a jail
now i know a refuge never grows
from a chin in a hand
and a thoughtful pose
gotta tend the earth
if you want a rose

i had a lot of good intentions
sit around for fifty years
and then collect a pension
started seeing the road to hell
and just where it starts
but my life is more than a vision
the sweetest part is acting
after making a decision
started seeing the whole
as a sum of its parts

and i look behind my ears for the green
and even my sweat smells clean
glare off the white hurts my eyes
gotta get out of bed
get a hammer and a nail
learn how to use my hands
not just my head
i think myself in a jail
now i know a refuge never grows
from a chin in a hand
and a thoughtful pose
gotta tend the earth
if you want a rose

my life is part of the global life
i'd found myself becoming more immobile
when i'd think a little girl in the world
can't do anything
a distant nation my community
and a street person my responsibility
if i have a care in the world
i have a gift to bring

i look behind my ears for the green
even my sweat smells clean
glare off the white hurts my eyes
i gotta get out of bed
get a hammer and a nail
learn how to use my hands
not just my head
i think myself in a jail
now i know a refuge never grows
from a chin in a hand
and a thoughtful pose
gotta tend the earth
if you want a rose



Hey Jesus
hey jesus it's me
i don't usually talk to you
but my baby's gonna leave me
and there's something you must do
i am not your faithful servant
i hang around sometimes
with a bunch of your black sheep
but if you make my baby stay
i'll make it up to you
and that's a promise i will keep

hey jesus it's me
i'm the one who talked to you yesterday
and i asked you please please
for a favor but my baby's gone away
went away anyway
and i don't really think its fair
you've got the power to make us all
believe in you
and then we call you in our despair
and you don't come through

hey jesus it's me
i'm sorry
i don't remember all i said
i had a few, no, too many
and they went straight to my head
and made me feel like i could argue with god
but you know it's easy for you
you got friends all over the world
you had the whole world waiting for your birth
but now i ain't got nobody
i don't know what my life's worth

i'm not gonna call on you any more
i'm sure you've got a million things to do
all i was trying to do
was to get through to you
get through to you
because when i die and i get up to your doors
i don't even know if you're gonna let me in the place
how come i gotta die
to get a chance to talk to
you face to face



History Of Us
i went all the way to paris to forget your face
captured in stained glass, young lives long since passed
statues of lovers every place
i went all across the continent to relieve this restless love
i walked through the ruins, icons of glory
smashed by the bombs from above

so we must love while these moments are still called today
take part in the pain of this passion play
stretching our youth as we must, until we are ashes to dust
until time makes history of us

jeu de paume's full of faces knowing peace, knowing strife
leisure and toil, still it's canvas and oil
there's just no medium for life
in the midst of the rubble i felt a sense of rebirth
in a dusty cathedral the living god called
and i prayed for my life here on earth

so we must love while these moments are still called today
take part in the pain of this passion play
stretching our youth as we must, until we are ashes to dust
until time makes history of us

there are mountains in switzerland, brilliant cold as they stand
from my hotel room, watching the half-moon
bleeding its light like a lamb
and the town is illumined, its tiny figures are fast asleep
and it dawns on me the time is upon me
to return to the flock i must keep

so we must love while these moments are still called today
take part in the pain of this passion play
stretching our youth as we must, until we are ashes to dust
until time makes history of us



Leeds
it's dark at 4 pm in leeds
the steeples pierce the skylight till the last of it bleeds
the absent sound of another day as it recedes
into the shadows
until it's nothing

fax papers slipped under the hotel room door
like food for the prisoner or the prospect to the whore
well fed and halfway drunk i ache myself for more
until i'm shadows of myself
until i'm nothing

sixteen black churches burning on the tv
all the way from texas to tennessee
and a politician locks my eye and says to me
there is no crisis here
there's no conspiracy

i crave inertia every move made so i can stop
whatever this madness is in me spinning like a top
on a bed of anxiety over a deep dark drop
down into nothingness
into withoutyouness

was it ever so the evil creep like ivy
a toe hold on the stronger half of nature's dichotomy
i'm beating back a path through nothing more than pure insistence
until here becomes
the distance

hold my head love i'm sick tonight
find the open hole and press your fingers there with all your might
before the last ounce of my spirit bleeds
onto the pristine sheets
of the hotel bed in leeds


Left Me A Fool
everybody loves you
and they want to know your story
you go riding out a mystery
concealed in all your glory
but when it comes to flesh and bones
you remind me of shallot
only made of shadows
even though you're not

i remember how i spent
all my energy and time
with affected conversation
trying to pry inside your mind
you are as beautiful as truth
and as empty as a shell
and i came to you one night
and it made me feel like hell

oh to reach through all your surface
just to find an empty pool
and to suffer all your pride
as i lay down by your side
and you swallowed up my heart
and left me a fool
left me a fool

everybody loves a hero
an image to create
the antithesis of everything
inside ourselves we hate
but you'd better close your eyes
when it's time for them to die
because you'd hate to think the life
you'd built upon them was a lie

oh to reach through all your surface
just to find an empty pool
and to suffer all your pride
as i lay down by your side
and you swallowed up my heart
and left me a fool
left me a fool

i resign myself to silence
i will never blow your cover
no one ever has to know
who the hero took for lover
but it has come to mind as you blaze on
as brilliant as a star
how many you've left behind
how many casualties there are

oh to reach through all your surface
just to find an empty pool
and to suffer all your pride
as i lay down by your side
and you swallowed up my heart
and left me a fool
left me a fool



Love Will Come To You
guess i wasn't the best one to ask
me myself with my face pressed
up against love's glass
to see the shiny toy i've been hoping for
the one i never could afford
the wide world spins and spits turmoil
and the nations toil for peace
but the paws of fear upon your chest
only love can soothe that beast
and my words are paper tigers
no match for the predators of pain inside her

i say love will come to you
hoping just because i spoke the words that they're true
as if i offered up a crystal ball to look through
where there's now one there will be two

i was born under the sign of cancer
(love will come to you)
like brushing cloth i smooth the wrinkles for an answer
(love will come)
i'm always closing my eyes and wishing i'm fine
(i close my eyes and wish you fine)
even though i know i'm not this time
(even though i know your not this time)

i say love will come to you
hoping just because i spoke the words that they're true
as if i offered up a crystal ball to look through
where there's now one there will be two

dodging your memories a field of knives
always on the outside looking in on other's lives

i say love will come to you
hoping just because i spoke the words that they're true
as if i offered up a crystal ball to look through
(i have offered up to you)
where there's now one there will be two

and i wish her insight to battle love's blindness
strength from the milk of human kindness
a safe place for all the pieces that scattered
learn to pretend there's more than love that matters



Love's Recovery
during the time of which i speak
it was hard to turn the other cheek
to the blows of insecurity
feeding the cancer of my intellect
the blood of love soon neglected
lay dying in the strength of its impurity
meanwhile our friends we thought were so together
they've all gone and left each other
in search of fairer weather
and we sit here in our storm and drink a toast
to the slim chance of love's recovery

there i am in younger days, star gazing
painting picture perfect maps
of how my life and love would be
not counting the unmarked paths of misdirection
my compass, faith in love's perfection
i missed ten million miles of road i should have seen
meanwhile our friends we thought were so together
left each other one by one on the road to fairer weather
and we sit here in our storm and drink a toast
to the slim chance of love's recovery

rain soaked and voice choked
like silent screaming in a dream
i search for our absolute distinction
not content to bow and bend
to the whims of culture that swoop like vultures
eating us away, eating us away
eating us away to our extinction

oh how i wish i were a trinity
so if i lost a part of me
i'd still have two of the same to live
but nobody gets a lifetime rehearsal
as specks of dust we're universal
to let this love survive
would be the greatest gift that we could give
tell all the friends who think they're so together
that these are ghosts and mirages
all these thoughts of fairer weather
though it's storming out i feel safe within the arms
of love's discovery



Southland In The Springtime
maybe we'll make texas by the morning
light the bayou with our tail lights in the night
800 miles to el paso from the state line
and we never have the money for the flight
i'm in the back seat sleepy from the travel
we played our hearts out all night long in new orleans
and i'm dirty from the diesel fumes, drinking coffee black
when the first breath of texas comes in clean
and there's something bout the southland in the springtime
where the waters flow with confidence and reason
though i miss her when i'm gone
it won't ever be too long
till i'm home again to spend my favorite season
when god made me born a yankee he was teasin'
there's no place like home and none more pleasin'
than the southland in the springtime

in georgia nights are softer than a whisper
beneath a quilt somebody's mother made by hand
with the farmland like a tapestry
passed down through generations
and the peach trees stitched across the land
there'll be cider up near helen off the roadside
and boiled peanuts in a bag to warm your fingers
and the smoke from the chimneys meets its maker in the sky
with a song that winter wrote whose melody lingers
and there's something bout the southland in the springtime
where the waters flow with confidence and reason
though i miss her when i'm gone
it won't ever be too long
till i'm home again to spend my favorite season
when god made me born a yankee he was teasin'
there's no place like home and none more pleasin'
than the southland in the springtime



Strange Fire
i come to you with strange fire
i make an offering of love
the incense of my soul is burned
by the fire in my blood
i come with a softer answer
to the questions that lie in your path
i want to harbor you from the anger
find a refuge from the wrath

this is a message
a message of love
love that moves from the inside out
love that never grows tired
i come to you with strange fire
fire

mercenaries of the shrine
now who are you to speak for god
with haughty eyes and lying tongues
and hands that shed innocent blood
now who delivered you the power
to interpret calvary
you gamble away our freedom
to gain your own authority

find another state of mind
you know it's time we all learned
to grab hold
strange fire burns
with the motion of love


fire
fire

when you learn to love yourself
you will dissolve all the stones that are cast
now you will learn to burn the icing sky
to melt the waxen mask
i said to have the gift of true release
this is a peace that will take you higher
oh i come to you with my offering
i bring you strange fire

this is a message
a message of love
love that moves from the inside out
love that never grows tired
i come to you with strange fire
fire
fire
i come to you with strange fire


Three Hits
three hits to the heart son
and it's poetry in motion
one could send you down the river
three's a strange way to be delivered

would you trade your words for freedom
that's a barter for a blind man
three hits to the heart son
and it's poetry in motion

are you levee'd like a treasure
only words can help me find you
and this world's a fickle measure
i would painfully remind you

from a wise man to your red hand
you lay covered ion our best sins
three hits to the heart son
and it's poetry in motion

well i dream you constant stranger
with your best bloods and your anger
you say mother do you claim me
my beloved do you blame me

well the first two might release you
but the last one sings in me son
three hits to the heart son
and it's poetry in motion

three hits to the heart son
and the last one sings in me



Virginia Woolf
some will strut and some will fret
see this an hour on the stage
others will not but they'll sweat
in their hopelessness and their rage
we're all the same the men of anger
and women of the page

they published your diary
and that's how i got to know you
the key to the room of your own and a mind without end
and here's a young girl
on a kind of a telephone line through time
and the voice at the other end comes like a long lost friend
so i know i'm all right
life will come and life will go
still i feel it's all right
cause i just got a letter to my soul
and when my whole life is on the tip of my tongue
empty pages for the no longer young
the apathy of time laughs in my face
you say "each life has its place"

the hatches were battened
the thunderclouds rolled and the critics stormed
the battle surrounded the white flag of your youth
if you need to know that you weathered the storm
of cruel mortality
a hundred years later i'm sitting here living proof
so you know you're all right
(all right)
life will come and life will go
(life will come and go)
still you'll feel it's all right
(all right)
someone'll get a letter to your soul
(someone gets your soul)
when your whole life is on the tip of your tongue
empty pages for the no longer young
the apathy of time laughed in your face
did you hear me say "each life has its place"

the place where you hold me
dark in a pocket of truth
the moon had swallowed the sun and the light of the earth
and so it was for you
when the river eclipsed your life
and sent your soul like a message in a bottle to me
and it was my rebirth
so we know we're all right
(all right)
though life will come and life will go
(though life will come and life will go)
still you'll feel it's all right
(all right)
someone'll will get a letter to your soul
(someone gets your soul)
then you know you're all right
(when my whole life is on the tip of my tongue)
then you feel you're all right
(empty pages for the no longer young)
and your hear dry you eyes
(you said)
and you know it's all right
(each life has it's place)
and your hear dry your eyes
(you said)
and you know it's all right
(each life has it's place)
and it's all right
(it'll be all right)


Watershed
thought i knew my mind
like the back of my hand
the gold and the rainbow
but nothing panned out as i planned
and they say only milk and honey's
gonna make your soul satisfied
well i better learn how to swim
cause the crossing is chilly and wide

twisted guardrails on the highway
broken glass on the cement
a ghost of someone's tragedy
how recklessly my time has been spent
they say that it's never too late
but you don't, you don't get any younger
well i better learn how to starve the emptiness
and feed the hunger

up on the watershed
standing at the fork in the road
you can stand there and agonize
till your agony's your heaviest load
you'll never fly as the crow flies
get used to a country mile
when you're learning to face
the path at your pace
every choice is worth your while

and there's always retrospect
(when you're looking back)
to light a clearer path
every five years or so i look back on my life
and i have a good laugh
you start at the top
go full circle round
catch a breeze
take a spill
but ending up where i started again
makes me wanna stand still

up on the watershed
standing at the fork in the road
you can stand there and agonize
till your agony's your heaviest load
you'll never fly as the crow flies
get used to a country mile
when you're learning to face
the path at your pace
every choice is worth your while

stepping on a crack
breaking up and looking back
til every tree limb overhead just seems to sit and wait
til every step you take becomes a twist of fate

up on the watershed
standing at the fork in the road
you can stand there and agonize
till your agony's your heaviest load
you'll never fly as the crow flies
get used to a country mile
when you're learning to face
the path at your pace
every choice is worth your while

up on the watershed
standing at the fork in the road
you can stand there and agonize
till your agony's your heaviest load
you'll never fly as the crow flies
get used to a country mile
when you're learning to face
the path at your pace
every choice is worth your while

and when you're learning to face
the path at your pace
every choice is worth your while


You & Me Of The 10,000 Wars
you and me of the 10,000 wars
dividing life into factions of pleasure and chores
a bed to be made and a bed to lie in
a hand in the darker side
and our sights set on zion

the heart of a skeptic and the mind of a child
put my life in a box and let my imagination run wild
pour the cement for my feet
the heart and the mind on a parallel course
never the two shall meet
and oh the dissatisfied with the satisfied
everybody loves a melodrama and the scandal of a lie
still you held your arms open
for the prodigal daughter
i see my eyes in your eyes through my eyes
still waters

try making one and one make one
twist the shapes until everything comes undone
watch the wizard behind the curtain
the larger than life and the power of seeming certain
the evil ego and the vice of pride
is there ever anything else that makes us take our different sides
i wanted everything to feed me
about as full as i got was of myself
and the upper echalons of mediocrity
and oh the dissatisfied with the satisfied
everybody loves a melodrama and the scandal of a lie
still you held your arms open
for the prodigal daughter
i see my eyes in your eyes through my eyes
still waters
still waters

after the battles and we're still around
everything once up in the air has settled down
sweep the ashes let the silence find us
a moment of peace is worth every war behind us
you and me of the 10,000 wars
Comments 
23rd-Nov-2003 10:13 am (UTC)
I recently discovered the Indigo Girls, and I adore them! I only have Retrospective so far, but I've heard a bunch of songs on Launch.com and hope to get some more CDs for Christmas. They're amazing. Thanks for all these lyrics!!
23rd-Nov-2003 02:52 pm (UTC) - weird
I just bought a used copy of "Strange Fire" and you go and post this.


Hey Jesus owns me.
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