?

Log in

No account? Create an account
BACK DOOR BOY IN A FRONT DOOR WORLD
OUTSIDE OF SOCIETY - THAT'S WHERE I WANT TO BE
Sunday Morning 
16th-Mar-2003 09:46 am
I feel very restless this morning. I usually ahve the baby to contend with after I've had my coffee and everyone has left for the day, so she sustains my energy level - but she's at Grandmommy's with Cole and I feel like I'm going stir crazy.

I'm definitely riding my bike this afternoon, the weather is supposed to be in the 70's and there is no rain on radar. I have no idea where I want to go riding, that depends on if anyone else wants to go along. I'm cool for riding here or going downtown.

We have to go to Sam's today as we didn't have enough time yesterday to go. I think that's about the only place we have to go. Did the big weekly grocery shop trip yesterday. I love going to Sam's and if nothing else just looking around. There's something very comforting about that place. The air in there is artificial and the light is as well, so you kind of go into a dream state when you're in there. Kind of like shopping in the mall. I think there are little subliminal messages in the elevator music they pump into these places that make you want to buy unnecessary shit...

There is some infighting amongst friends right now that is (as usual) most distressing. It's really sad when you get down to it. Sadder still is that is just keeps cycling somehow. I'm still waiting to get myself brought into that crap someday, as I know it isn't far away. I could even tell you what I think it will be that comes around and tries to drag me into it - but at the risk of inciting said bullshit I'll keep it to myself. That being said, this IS my journal, so...

If any of you spend time wondering why people (for the most part) don't trust you or hold you in high regard, how about trying to be a more trustworthy friend all of the time and see where that leads.

One thing I'm learning about myself as I get older is that my patience for children over the age of 18 is so thin you could fucking read microfiche through it. I spend the majority of my day with a 10 month old and a 6 year old, both of whom are 10,000 times easier to deal with than some people I know.

Maggie and I were talking yesterday in the car on the way to Damien's house about something I'd like to share. She told me about this kid she knew in high school who was a doctor's son. This kid got a Ferrari for his 16th birthday, right - then did something bad and his father took away the Ferrari and gave him a Land Rover instead as punishment. ::goes into a flurry of seizures with that distinctive "OH FUCK OFF, JUST FUCK OFF!!" look:: This is not only sad, this is downright cruel. I'm sorry, but struggling for something and having to make due with what you have instead of having something on your own is one of the only things that builds a person's character - not imagining how you want your life to be and pretending that is who you really are. It makes you resourceful and independent, it makes you show what you're really made of when you have to take care of yourself without a safety net.

I'm thinking of many different people as I write this, some I know and some I used to know, so before anyone decides to post comments to this entry I'll remind you that no one is being singled out here. Remember that before posting commentary that might incriminate you and show anyone reading that I'm describing you to a "T". When you're wrong, 9 times out of 10 you know that shit before you decide to fuck up and still keep on going.

::turns on my heel, takes ball, goes home::
This page was loaded Nov 21st 2017, 12:02 pm GMT.